I’m going for a world record for post in one night. I really am about to go to sleep. I just wanted to share this. I wanted to write this first but I debated back and forth for hours about the right way to go about this. There is no right way. Let me just say that this did happen to me. I am living this right now. It may come across mean spirited, but its not. Its a rant only slightly structured. Comment if you must. Just be gentle….
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Would you talk to someone who told you that they had an STD.? I mean how do you really handle that? I’m all for not disclosing too much information about past relationships. I don’t need to know dates, places, or kinky places you fucked. It’s just not necessary, under normal circumstance. Again, I know that with dating nothing is as easy as 2+2. Maybe your last love was a chronic cheater; maybe you dated a club head. Or just maybe you caught the herpes when you were 15 and have been living with it for 10 years, without medication.
How am I supposed to react? After the dramatic build up, “I have something to tell you and I don’t know how you will react.” Do you want me to invite you over for cookies and maybe some foreplay? I don’t understand and the fact that you are not currently treating your condition that never really goes away. I do watch television. I know about Valtrex! Why don’t you? And if you do, why aren’t you on it?
A more important question…Who slept with you? How many times? Do you tell everyone? Was I special?
Not saying that having an STD is signing your death wish. You might find love. I guess you still deserve it. Everyone makes mistakes. I’ve made mistakes. I have more to make, but none of them involve consciously endangering the well being of someone I might have feelings for or even respect on the slightest of levels.
Talk about confused.
The answer should be clear. Go get some help, then maybe we can kiss and even that’s a bit of a stretch.
I guess the sad part is the herpes is not the worst part! It’s the fact that people walk around with these conditions and just don’t choose to take care of them.
It would be all the same if instead of herpes it was a child and you just forgot to feed or change or nurture it. Your mistakes are always fixable. There is always room to mend anywhere there is a tear.
The fact that you left this tear as is allowed it to open, and somehow you expect me to fall into it open heartedly. You got me fucked up. REAL FUCKED UP!
I love the person you are and the possibility of what could be, and your honesty is honorable. I don’t know how I would go about making a confession to someone I was romantically pursing. But it doesn’t change that fact that your honesty cannot cover up your blatant ignorance.
GROW UP!
GO TO THE DOCTOR!
STOP PRETENDING LIKE YOU CAN’T BE THE OUTBREAK MONKEY! MONKEY!
THEN WE CAN TALK
A real rock and a hard place,
KD
